I recently attended a webinar hosted by award-winning creative nonfiction writer Nicole Breit, The Rules of Creative Nonfiction (and When to Break Them). In it, Nicole—a great writer and teacher—offered an hour’s worth of tips for aspiring CNF writers.
I wanted to post something I wrote at her prompt.
In the webinar, she mentioned some ideas to help break free from creative restraints (as well as create distance from emotion-heavy subjects) before getting started.
One option was to practice by writing your story as a how-to list, a postcard, or a recipe.
Because I enjoy creating recipes, I zeroed in on that one. So, I started writing a “recipe” that cooked my life story. Even though I mentioned some pretty serious things, it was fun because I could focus on the format instead of reliving painful memories—just as she said. (Thanks, Nicole!).
So if you’re interested, here is my recipe for Le pain de me vie (The bread of my life):
Le Pain de ma Vie
- Servings: 1 loaf
- Ready in: about 40 years
Ingredients
- 1 narcissist, ripe
- 1 codependent, raw
- 1 narcissist, unripe
- 6 deeply traumatic childhood events
- 2 heaping tablespoons of narcissistic abuse and bullying, divided
- 3 deeply traumatic events in early adulthood
- 2 addictions, more if desired
- 1 bottomless cup of shame
- 2 heartbreaking losses
- 1 emotional breakdown
- 1 meditation practice, repeated daily
- 1 spiritual awakening
- 1 teaspoon of faith
- 1 meditation guru or teacher, if desired
- 1 leap of faith
Directions
- Take the narcissist and the codependent and place them in a medium-sized house. Mix in the unripe narcissist, preferably aged 4-5 years. Fold in the 6 traumatic childhood events and the first tablespoon of bullying and abuse.
- The mixture will be discarded after 18 years. Retrieve it as soon as possible and mix in the 3 traumatic events in early adulthood to fully develop the flavors from step 1.
- Pour in the cup of shame to speed the downward spiral. Stir to combine. Once all hope, self-esteem, and confidence have evaporated, it is the perfect time to season the mixture with 2 addictions (alcohol and nicotine are ideal, but you can use whatever you have on hand). Let marinate for at least 5 years.
- Using a wooden spoon, mix in the heartbreaking losses. (Any will do, but the rapid deterioration of a long-term relationship and the sudden, unexpected expiration of the codependent parent are recommended).
- Add the remaining tablespoon of bullying and abuse. Stir until bitterness, resentment, and a deep self-loathing start to develop. Set aside for 2 years.
- If you’ve performed the previous steps correctly, the emotional breakdown should occur naturally. (If it doesn’t, discard the mixture and start again.)
- Carefully remove both narcissists; discard.
- Add the meditation practice and the spiritual awakening and stir until the mixture forms a wet, soft dough. Sprinkle in the teaspoon of faith and knead until the dough becomes firm. Cover and let rise for 1 year.
- Combine the meditation guru and the leap of faith to activate, then spread over the dough for a beautiful color and a crispy crust. (If you omit the guru, triple the leap of faith.)
- Bake in a 375º oven until golden. Let cool on a wire rack. Enjoy!
Sharing your story is a key part of healing. If you sometimes struggle with this, like me, creative nonfiction can offer some protection while providing an outlet for working through your trauma uniquely and creatively. In this exercise, I had a great time experimenting with a different form of writing. It was therapeutic to express my experiences without reliving the pain of the past. Instead of feeling heavy, I felt light. Instead of being drained, I was energized. It was a wholly different experience than I’m used to, in the best way. While every experience won’t necessarily be this positive, I feel this is the beginning of a new level of healing. And I’m excited about what’s coming next.
IMBALANCED 